Diana Watch

Yes I know it’s late, sorry, I had a very busy Sunday and I’ve just come in now to find a couple of tail fathers on my stairs and a Thrush sat on my computer monitor and my cat looking deeply smug. The bird war released unharmed, well if you count out the tail feathers obviously. Other wildlife related stories, I saw a Barn Owl this week and this has made me very happy. I’ve never seen one in the wild before so this was a very nice thing to see. As you may have noticed I’ve started with animal stories so some of you may be thinking “ah there aren’t any Diana stories this week are there? “ and you would be right. A Madeline McCann story, “the McCann’s first holiday since their child went missing”, I hope there are a little more attentive this time, and a couple of Prince William and Harry stories but nothing on their Mum. Fear not though, I will persist, mostly because it’s fun and I don’t have that much to do, except of course, get married which I will be doing in 2 weeks time so there will be no Diana watch on the 22nd of June and maybe the 29th as I’ll be on honeymoon and I don’t think significant other would be overly impressed.

Comedy Named MEP of the Week,

Den Dover who has denied any wrong-doing in paying his wife and daughter a reported £750,000 for work over nine years but I care not about this, I care about his silly, silly name.

Lazy Journalism of the Week,

This week it goes to the BBC. Before every major football tournament most news programs will use the following format. 2 news presenters, one man, one woman, and 2 guests, one football loving man and one football hating women, usually a comedian and usually over weight, and they discuss the pros and cons of football and 5 to 10 minutes is filled and nothing is learnt. I was unfortunate enough to see this on Saturday morning on the BBC’s breakfast news. Stop it. Think of something new.

Pointless Warning of the Week,

Thank you very much Channel 4 for giving significant other and myself the biggest laugh of the week. Before they show a film they give out o warning of some sort if the film is violent or whatever. On Saturday night channel 4 showed Team America, the marionette amusement from South Park creators Tray Parker and Matt Stone and due to the content of the movie Channel 4 felt that the following warning was necessary, “the following film contains strong language and scenes of a sexual nature.” Scenes of a sexual nature? THEY’RE PUPPETS!

Lame Apology of the Week,

For those of you who do not watch Formula 1 you will have missed the crapest crash of all time which resulted in both Lewis Hamilton and Kimi Raikkonen retiring from Sundays Canadian Grand Prix. Long story but Hamilton crashed into back of Raikkonen at the end of the pit lane at about 20 miles per hour. Lewis has since said “I apologise to Kimi if I ruined his race. I would rather neither of us be out.” IF I ruined his race? I think that we can all agree that yes you did ruin his race because you broke his car by not looking where you were going.

I had a slightly odd experience in Waitrose earlier today. I am wearing a T-shirt that say godless liberal on it. Whilst shopping on old lady pointed at it, laughed loudly and poked me in the chest. Very odd indeed.