“Alan Bennett didn't want it so he gave it to me.”
Hello again, sorry it's Monday and you're only just reading this. Well I'm sorry it's Monday all round really as I had the nicest weekend. We spent Saturday and Sunday at the Hay Literary festival at Hay on Wye. A lovely time was had by all, helped by the excellent weather. I was in Wales and I was hot. I'm not sure if this has happened to me before.
We went to 4 events during our time there. We spent to see the Early Edition with Marcus Brigstock. We saw Sarah Walters promoting her new book and significant other got her copy signed. Today we saw the philosopher AC Grayling talking about our declining civil liberties and Simon Schama talking about his new book at tremendous speed. All of them funny and entertaining. It is a bit middle class playground but if you can get past that a good time will be had, unless you are a middle aged, middle class bloke in a linen jacket because you'll fit right in.
We took a few pictures to try and capture some of the atmosphere, see what you think,
Because there has only been MP expense based news again this week I'm only going to do some awards,
The Award for Nice Thing For London to do of the Week,
Boris Johnson, not a man who I agree with that much although he is entertaining, is going to place 30 odd pianos on street corners around our capital city so that people can have a bit of an ivory tinkle when they want. How nice is that? Just leaving some pianos, bolted down obviously, for people to play.
The Award for Newspaper Phrase I Would Advice You Not to Google,
This goes to the News of the World who described Susan Boyle for Britain's Got Talent as an “Hairy Angle”. Don't Google this, it's not pretty, unless you like that sort of thing of course.
The Award for Most Embarrassing Data Loss of the Week,
This goes to the RAF who lost a hard drive earlier in the week. It contained the personal details of many of their staff. Now this would be bad enough, a military service loosing data, but it isn't that simple. The hard drive also contained RAF files on officers and their more interesting habits and personal peccadilloes. The files contain details of senior RAF staff who have had affairs and have been caught taking drugs and many other fun things. The files were, of course, not encrypted. Oh dear, oh dear. But it is very funny.
The Award for Advertising Campaign That Encourages the Biggest Waste of Your Money of the Week,
So this could go on the spray on hair I saw advertised on the channel “Dave” last week but there is one that is so ridiculous it can not be beaten.
Ladies and Gentlemen I give you the Volvic challenge. For those of you not familiar with this advert, some bloke says that he has been asked to drink a 1 and a half litres of water per day. You get a sort of video diary and he says he feels better at the end of the 2 week challenge. Now, there is nothing wrong with that. Being well hydrated is good for you. It aids weight loss, it's good for the skin etc. The problem is the nonsense ad speak at the end of the piece that insinuates that there is something special about Volvic that makes it different for other water. Well, yes there is. The price. The cheapest Volvic I could find was £2.20 per litre meaning that per day the Challenge will cost you £3.30. Tap water on the other hand, which has higher standards of cleanliness than bottled water, is about £1 per 1000 litres so drinking the recommended amount will cost you about 0.15 pence per day. £2.20 per day Vs £0.0015 per day. The choice seems pretty clear to me.
I'm sorry about the lack of proper news this week but I promise that I try harder next week, as long as we don't have to suffer MP's expenses too much.