Sorry about last week xx I had no internet connection so couldn't post anything. To be honest it was my fault that the internet broke. “How hard can it be to set up a small network of 2 computers at home?” I thought to myself. It turns out that it is quite hard. Many odd things happened to our PC so I had to restore factory settings and then I couldn't re-install the modem drivers and other techy nonsense, so no internet access. Sorry again, but no one complained.
I think we shall only have a short blog this week because I haven't really been concentrating on the news that much. Had some stuff on my mind. I know I don't usually use this for personal stuff but that's not going to stop me.
I have got a new job. Well a bit of one. I'm going to work part-time, to start with, in a new GP surgery in Weymouth. I have handed in my notice and my last working day at my current place of work, were I have been for roughly 16 years, is June 8th.
I have to be honest; I'm a little scared for several reasons. It's a new post so I not completely sure what I'm going to be doing and for a while it is going to be part-time and I am going to have to continue to work in the hospital as a bank nurse so my income is going to be unreliable for a while. I'm not a risk taker. OK, so I've bungee jumped and rode my bike off of things but those were only transient things. This is money. My mortgage payments people but I'm sure it will be fine. It will be fine. Please tell me it will be fine. Like I said, I've worked in the same place for 16 years with a constant income, oh god, what have I done?
No, it will be good for me. I need a change.
Some news has happened this week but it has mostly been about MPs expenses, still. Today is day 17 of the Daily Telegraph doing exactly what I predicted they would. Every day they publish the expenses of 4 or 5 MPs and manage to cause a bit of a fuss.
Now, whilst I agree that some of the expenses are a little outlandish and some border on fraud, I'm still not that interested. Is it getting so much coverage because it is really easy to understand, it's poorly reported sometimes but it's easy to understand, unlike the financial crisis which seems to be taking up very few column inches at the moment. We need to have a national debate (horrid phrase) about the national finances. How are we going to pay for this new massive level of debt? Are we going to cutting funding for the NHS and Schools? Or the Armed Forces? What reform of banking do we need to stop these things happening again? These are the important issues not second home allowances.
The one thing that has come out of all this tedium is the ever present class difference between the 2 main parties and what they spend their ill-gotten gains upon. Working class Labour people spend their money on Mock-Tudor beams and fucking big televisions, to quote Irvin Welsh, whilst all ready rich Tory MPs used it for much more interesting things. £1600 for a floating duck house. £4000 to have a moat cleaned, I mean, who has a moat? Is he worried about Dragons? And my local member of parliament spent £2000 on getting a pipe under his tennis court fixed and than claimed in a local paper that he felt that he was being picked on. You spent £2000 on fixing your tennis court! Not really essential for being in London on week nights is it?
What is upsetting is that David Cameron has come across as a man in charge, where as Gordon Brown has looked ponderous and slow footed. It is a shame but I think we are in the death throws of this Labour Government. Please vote Liberal Democrat. I know you probably won't but it would be nice.
Another thing that doesn't interest me but I'm going to write about was the Jordan and Peter Andre splitting up thing. I was amused by the statement they released asking for some privacy at this time. Really? Privacy? You two? A relationship that was born on reality television and then developed on reality television, with wedding photos sold exclusively to a magazine. Oh yes and then exclusive interviews with The Sun and OK magazine since that statement. Don't you think that it's a bit late for that? Some cynical people have hypothesised that this is just a publicity stunt but even I hadn't thought of that.
I have used the unfortunate situation for the children to judge my “friends” on Facebook. So far I have only deleted one of them for mentioning Peter and Jordan one of their status updates but I will not hesitate in acting if it happens again.
1600 people have been arrested on terrorist charges in the UK since 9 of November 2001, oh no sorry September the 11th 2001 (Stuart Lee joke there) but how many of them have been convicted on these charges? Less than 10%. More have been convicted of immigration offences than terrorism. I think we may be trying to hard.
And while we are talking about terrorism related things, Guantanamo Bay. President Obama wants to shut it down but is having a little trouble because, well to be honest I'm not sure why. The level of the debate is so low that I'm not sure that any rational arguments have been made. The Saviour of the free world would like to bring the suspected evil-doers to America and charge them properly. Making sure that they have fair trials and are properly represented, however some think that this is a bad idea. Not just the fair trials things but just the bring them to America bit. I can't tell you why because I really didn't understand. “Don't bring them here, they could radicalise us or kill us all or something.” They are in prison! I'm pretty sure that there are some bad people in America who are in prison and you don't seem to have a problem with them. No one has ever escaped from one of your super high security prisons. These ALLEGED terrorist aren't that clever, they got caught, so I don't think they are going to be tunnelling out or hiding in laundry trucks.
You decided that they may have done something bad so you should sort it out. We charge and imprison our terrorists, not as many as we arrest obviously, but that is how it works.
My own awards now, because they won't let me on the panel in Cannes,
The Award for Stating the Obvious of the Week,
This goes to More4 news who, whist showing some footage of the English Civil War, felt it necessary to put the word “Re-enactment” along the bottom screen. Well thank you for that.
The Award for Icky Product of the Week,
Ladies and Gentleman, I give you Lanacane Anti-Chaffing Gel. This is a gel to stop the fat bits of fat people rubbing together as they walk. Oh that is nice. I would imagine that if you have to buy a gel to stop your thighs starting a fire as you stroll to the fridge, you should maybe consider not eating any more for a while.
So I have a new job but I have been turned down for a couple recently. I was not the new Bond nor Dr Who and it was announced this week that I am not going to be Britain's first astronaut either. Some bloke who was appropriately qualified for the job and called Major Tim Peake seems to have got it instead, Git.
Have a good week; I'm off to worry a bit more.