Thursday, 14 August 2008

A-levels and Jelly fish

So here we go again. I think I wrote this last year but please can we let students who are receiving their A-level results celebrate their success before everyone else weighs in telling them how worthless their hard-worked for qualifications are. It really isn’t very nice and it must be a little upsetting. Most of the time young people are being criticised for all the crime and anti-social behaviour in the country, statistics show that most of it isn’t them, but when they work hard, study and get useful qualifications, obviously I’m not including media studies in that list, they are criticised again. Stop it. At least wait until they have drunk their own weight in WKD.

The south coast of England is a dangerous place to be. Scary wild animals roam free in our seas. Hark! The sound of a cello! That’s a joke about the theme from Jaws by the way. What is this terrifying, vicious animal running rampant through the English Channel? Portuguese man-of-war jellyfish! Ok it’s not that scary but they can grow up to 150ft long and can be fatal, in really rare circumstances. To be honest only 14 have been found over the entire length of the south coast but you don’t get this level of sensible writing in the national press, “Invasion of the killer jellyfish!” yells the Mirror, “Coastal alert as killer jellyfish invade the shoreline of Britain” they continue, “Britain's beaches have been invaded by poisonous jellyfish that can kill with a single sting.” They then use the “swarms”. There have only been 14, for god’s sake, calm down.


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