Usually she just lies there in the faecal position. Today Martyn is in Kent. In the front line, so to speak. It’s like war reporting this. Let’s get it out of the way at the beginning because I know that it has become a little dull to hear me go on and on about Israel, it has been reflected in the readership numbers, but at the time of typing there is talk of a ceasefire. Much to the relief of the UN, as well as the Palestinians, who have had 2 schools and their headquarters in Gaza bombed, possibly with white phosphorus bombs, which are illegal. My point is this, what has Israel achieved? They claim that their goals for a ceasefire have been met but Hamas are still firing rockets at them, so that doesn’t seem to be one of them. Is it suspicious that they started talking about a ceasefire on the day that George W Bush left the White House? The timing is also significant in Israel because they have an election coming up. You don’t want to go into an election actually at war but going into it just after a war that you can claim you have won and see how seriously we take National Security, the only thing to be heard saying this season for any serious politician, does give you a reasonable platform. To claim that the war was merely electioneering would be a little cynical but hey….
It seems that no one listens to me. This will not come as a surprise to anyone but me. I turned on my television this week to see Iggy Pop advertising insurance. And after my “why do famous people do adverts” rant, oh how the mighty have fallen and while we are at it, The Jesus and Mary Chain and The Charlatans seem to have licensed their music for ads. It makes me sad but I suppose you have to make money. One other point, on the ghastly “Injury lawyers 4 U” adverts it is claimed that “they are real lawyers”. Good, I’m glad to hear it, although it is sort of what I would expect from a company of lawyers, even if they do use text speak in their company name. Oh and is that a vulture that appears over their name at the end of the ad? I don’t suppose for a minute that they have that level of self awareness but it would be nice.
Environment news now and I think we should start with a positive story from India. Delhi has banned the plastic bag and they’ve really gone for it as well, no silly little punishment for them, oh no, up to 5 years in jail. One of the reasons that they have banned them is because discarded bags were blocking the drains and this is remarkable unhelpful in a monsoon. They are not the first to ban them though; Rwanda, Bhutan and Bangladesh are also in on the act. So if some of the worlds poorest countries can do it, take this bold step into a plastic free future, why can’t we? Well the reason is Gordon Brown. And man who really doesn’t understand. This week has seen one of more odd announcements from this government, one that will haunt them until they are no longer in charge. We shall have a third runway at Heathrow. Why? Do we really need it? It is estimated that it will only generate £42 million a year which really isn’t that much. I have heard at least 2 government spokesmen saying that the 3rd runway will help us be more competitive on the other side of the recession and at least 1 said that it will help Britain’s (how will it help Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland?) infrastructure post-recession. Now the likelihood is that they won’t cut the first sod until 2012 and it won’t be finished until, at the earliest, 2020! How long do they think the recession is going to last?
Greenpeace is doing its bit in order to help hold things up. It has purchased a small piece of land within the area that will be needed for the expansion and is currently dividing the ownership up too as many people as possible. At the moment it is owned by about 12000 people and Greenpeace are going to start offering parts to foreign people in an attempt to slow down the compulsory purchase order process even more.
What the government has succeeded in doing is providing it critics with a really big, oily stick with which they can hit it every time they try and do something meaningful for the environment. Whatever suggestions they make we can shout back “Heathrow”. They have managed to shoot themselves in the foot so badly that now the Tories look like the environmentally friendly party. There should be a joke about recycled ideas here but I can’t be bothered. They took the opportunity that was presented to them and grasped it with a big tree hug and proudly announced their own plan to save the planet, some of which was very good, tidal power, an “intelligent” power grid and micro-generation (see I told you it was the way forward) but some of it was utter pish. Plugs all round London to recharge electric cars despite the fact that electric cars are rubbish and take hours to charge, for instance. Hydrogen fuel cells are the future anyway as you can fill them up like a petrol car. The government messed so badly that David Cameron could vote against getting rid of old style tungsten bulbs (as he did this week) and still look like the hippy. A quick fact for you, 14% of all the electricity generated in this country goes on lighting. Think of the power that could be saved of we all switched to low energy light bulbs? Even the Daily Mail agrees with that.
Let’s do some awards,
The Award For Fantastic Bit of Flying of the Week,
This goes to Chesley Sullenberger who managed to not hit anything in New York after taking off from LaGuardia Airport, getting hit by a flock of Geese, losing both engines and then somehow managing to land safely on the Hudson River. Take off to landing took 7 minutes. Lets be honest, we take our pilots for granted but when it comes down to it, they do a remarkable job.
The Award For Really Embarrassing Thing of the Week,
There really is no competition for this week; it really has to go to Kate Winslet and her awful, awful acceptance speech at the Golden Globes when she got her gong for being best at pretending to be someone else.
The Award For Funniest Art Instillation That Embarrassed A Government of the Week,
“And so we are going to be the EU presidential country for 6 months, how should we celebrate such a thing?” “I know, sculpture!” Unveiled this week was a sculpture to challenge European stereotypes. It was suppose to be by 27 different artists doing a bit about their own country, it turns out, however, that it was all done by one artist and a couple of his mates and some countries have found his jokes a tiny bit offensive. Bulgaria was portrayed as a toilet; Denmark was made out of Lego and, if viewed from a certain angle, looked a bit like one of the cartoons of Mohammad that pissed so many people. My favourite part of the work was the UK, which wasn’t there. See what they’ve done there? Britain is not really in Europe, see?
The Award for Fuss Over Nothing of the Week,
This goes to everyone who made a fuss about Baroness Whatsit saying that she could see “the green shots of recovery”. George Osborne claimed that she should apologise for the comment as she was insensitive and out of touch. A spectacular fuss was made in the press about it as well, claiming that it was a gaffe but really what it was was an answer to a direct question about the credit markets and her reply was in reference to a specific company getting a loan. Taken out of context it could be a little wrong but you could consider other business results out in the last weeks. Sales figures for Sainburys, HMV, Tesco, Aldi, Carphone Warehouse and the Smart Car are all up. Consumer confidence survey was up and the website Rightmoves.com says that numbers registering on the site looking for a new home had doubled on this time last year. Green shoots there might be.
Ok that will do for this week, hope you all have fun. Oh and listen to the new single by Britney Spears and Lily Allen because they are both fantastic. I know I should be telling you about obscure indie nonsense but pop music it good for you, sometimes anyway. To redress the balance may I recommend to you albums by The Acorn and Woodpigeon cos they are great too.
Showing posts with label eu. Show all posts
Showing posts with label eu. Show all posts
Sunday, 18 January 2009
Monday, 15 December 2008
Diana Watch
I was 2 and a half when I was born. Can you imagine my disappointment this morning when I got up and went to the kitchen, turned on the radio and the only working channel was Planet Rock and the tune that they were playing was Bon Jovi, it wasn’t the finest start to my day if I’m honest.
I’m sorry it’s late but I was going to do it yesterday afternoon but I had a surprise work instead, it seems that most of our staff are off sick with flu. I’m told it is very unpleasant, significant other has had it for over a fortnight now and is only now starting to feel better, so far no sickness in me, annoying smug I think you’ll find.
I have decided that I am deliberately obtuse. Monday was supposed to be the busiest internet shopping day of the year so I decided not to buy anything on purpose. On the subject of Christmas shopping we have an update, I have found a Transformers Megatron for my nephew, which is nice, but I now have another problem. What on earth do you buy a 96 year old for Christmas? If you’ve lived that long the likelihood is that you have most of things that you need yet I have to think of a present for my Nana’s 97th birthday on the 20th and then a Christmas present for 5 days later, it gets harder with each pressing year. Many, many years ago (about 8 or 9 to be honest) she asked for a 5 year diary, “that’s a bit optimistic” I said to her but which of us now has egg on our face? That would be eggy faced Martyn.
There have been some news stories around this week but they are all a little dull, repetitive or depressing but this seems to be a sort of news blog entry type of thing so let’s give one or two of them a go.
Two stories from the EU were quite entertaining, the first one involves those nice people in the Republic of Ireland, that’s the bit in the south that didn’t plant bombs everywhere that does seem to have been forgotten in our “War on Terror”, who said “No” to the EU constitution in a referendum many months ago and since then the whole constitution project has been dead in the water as all member states have to ratify it but now the brilliant minds that hide somewhere within the EU have come up with a plan of such staggering genius it makes you wonder why these people are not out curing cancer or doing something else worth while. There plan is so simple, why didn’t we think of it? The plan is this; ask the Irish if they are sure. That’s right, the Irish are going to get another go at getting the answer to a very simple question, would you like an EU constitution, right. They got it wrong last time so let’s see if they’ve learnt anything. The likelihood is, of course, that in asking a second time and making themselves look a bit silly that those who support the “Yes” campaign will loose by even more because you just annoy people be saying, “are you sure?” “no, really, are you sure” “is that you’ll final answer”
The other story is not so much about the EU but more about European politics in general. The German finance minister Peer Steinbrueck criticized Gordon Brown’s plan to save the economy in an interview say that the VAT cut would make no difference and that we would have levels of government debt that would take a generation to work off. Whilst both of these things are true the funny thing was the statement from the German Government offering “Clarification”. The statement said “it is not about criticizing our British friends,” really? Because that really is what it sounded like to me. The statement went on to say, “the Finance Minister simply made very clear…….. why a limited drop in VAT is not an appropriate instrument for Germany or for the fight against the Global recession.” Uh huh. Whilst it wasn’t about criticizing you, your idea is rubbish. It must be nice to be in politics, you can say one thing and then some one in your department will issue a statement for you spelling out what you meant to say in a special form of civil service double talk, nice.
A quick mention for assisted suicide, told one of the stories was depressing, as it came up twice this week. The first time was when the Crown Prosecution Service decided not time press charges against parents who help their 27 year old son take his life in Switzerland earlier in the year. This leaves us in an interesting legal grey area because helping someone to end their life in illegal in this country, helping them include enabling them to travel to another country where it is legal i.e. Switzerland, but, as far as I’m aware, the CPS has never pressed charges against anyone who has done this and as our legislators flatly refuse to even discuss the subject we are left with this situation were whilst it is illegal you won’t get prosecuted so it is sort of legal. Not the best way to leave this very complicated and emotive issue I think you will agree. Personally I am in favour of assisted suicide, if it was necessary I would like that option please. I would like to choose the manner and timing of my death if I was that ill. Obviously the problems would come in the legal framing of this so that people couldn’t be cajoled into doing it or people who felt that they had become a burden on their family etc but still I would like that option. You would put an animal out of its suffering, so why would you not help some one you love. Suffering is not just physical pain, it is the knowledge that at some point in your life the time is going to come all you can do is blink, you are feed by a tube, a machine breaths for you and all you can do is see this happening. The counter arguments are strong and persuasive but when they involve quality of life arguments the person best placed to make decisions on that is the person suffering.
The other mention of it was because Sky showed a documentary about it midweek. A couple’s journey was shown as they decided what they were going to do and then the final act as the man took his own life. There was shock and outrage in our papers, “how can they show a man die?” was the line taken by most of them. It’s a terrible thing, a new low, etc etc, oh and here are some pictures of it! I’m sorry? What now? Television is bad for showing it but it’s ok for you? No, fine, just so that we know where the line is. Many groups, mostly religious, were appalled that this program would be shown because it would “glorify” assisted suicide. Two points here, I am assuming that most of them hadn’t seen the film because very few people had; I don’t think they were at a press screening so they weren’t really making a well informed point and “Glorifying” assisted suicide? Glorifying death is very difficult with several thousand years of religious fundamentalism behind you. Simply showing some people making the most important decision that anyone can every make and then carrying out that decision isn’t glorifying anything, it shows how hard the choice is. It shows that these choices are not hurried, rash or flippantly made. No one was forced or persuaded. 2 rational people made a well informed decision. No more, no less. Many people just upset about a film on television showing death it’s self. I’m sorry; do you not watch the news? It is wall to wall death and suffering. Was it because it was a real, actual death and not a television entertainment death? It was not a Hollywood film or and HBO series, it was not news-atainment, it was real. It was a real person dying and that is hard to watch I can assure you.
A quick mention for the BBC’s Sport Personality of the Year, an amusing concept for me as most sportsman don’t seem to have a personality, but well done Chris Hoy, he was my choice, and well done Ben Geyser from Dorchester who won the Unsung Hero award for his work with local boxers.
And so to the awards,
The Award for Wuss of the Week,
This goes to the “comedian” Alan Carr who felt it necessary to apologise for a joke he made BACKSTAGE, not during the show, at National Comedy Awards. He said that he originally planned his Celebrity Ding Dong sketch to feature Rough Women not Fashionistas.
"It didn't work out because they couldn't cast it. I suppose it is a bit difficult to find rough women. I suppose Shannon Matthew's mum was busy," he said.
"Oh yeah, she would be my dream guest. I think she's a gay icon. People like a bit of rough don't they?"
Carr added: "I must be obsessed with her actually if you look at my Google searches. So I should dedicate this award to her."
My problem is not the joke, although it isn’t that funny, it’s the speed at which he apologised. It took him less than 24 hours because a couple of papers got a bit pissy, good, it’s his job, but clearly he doesn’t believe in the things that he said otherwise he would have stood by his remark.
The Award for Shaping My Formative Years,
This goes to Oliver Postgate, co-creator of Bagpuss, the Clangers and Ivor the Engine to name but a few who died this week. As a mini tribute here are a few little clips from some of his programs,
Bye for now.
I’m sorry it’s late but I was going to do it yesterday afternoon but I had a surprise work instead, it seems that most of our staff are off sick with flu. I’m told it is very unpleasant, significant other has had it for over a fortnight now and is only now starting to feel better, so far no sickness in me, annoying smug I think you’ll find.
I have decided that I am deliberately obtuse. Monday was supposed to be the busiest internet shopping day of the year so I decided not to buy anything on purpose. On the subject of Christmas shopping we have an update, I have found a Transformers Megatron for my nephew, which is nice, but I now have another problem. What on earth do you buy a 96 year old for Christmas? If you’ve lived that long the likelihood is that you have most of things that you need yet I have to think of a present for my Nana’s 97th birthday on the 20th and then a Christmas present for 5 days later, it gets harder with each pressing year. Many, many years ago (about 8 or 9 to be honest) she asked for a 5 year diary, “that’s a bit optimistic” I said to her but which of us now has egg on our face? That would be eggy faced Martyn.
There have been some news stories around this week but they are all a little dull, repetitive or depressing but this seems to be a sort of news blog entry type of thing so let’s give one or two of them a go.
Two stories from the EU were quite entertaining, the first one involves those nice people in the Republic of Ireland, that’s the bit in the south that didn’t plant bombs everywhere that does seem to have been forgotten in our “War on Terror”, who said “No” to the EU constitution in a referendum many months ago and since then the whole constitution project has been dead in the water as all member states have to ratify it but now the brilliant minds that hide somewhere within the EU have come up with a plan of such staggering genius it makes you wonder why these people are not out curing cancer or doing something else worth while. There plan is so simple, why didn’t we think of it? The plan is this; ask the Irish if they are sure. That’s right, the Irish are going to get another go at getting the answer to a very simple question, would you like an EU constitution, right. They got it wrong last time so let’s see if they’ve learnt anything. The likelihood is, of course, that in asking a second time and making themselves look a bit silly that those who support the “Yes” campaign will loose by even more because you just annoy people be saying, “are you sure?” “no, really, are you sure” “is that you’ll final answer”
The other story is not so much about the EU but more about European politics in general. The German finance minister Peer Steinbrueck criticized Gordon Brown’s plan to save the economy in an interview say that the VAT cut would make no difference and that we would have levels of government debt that would take a generation to work off. Whilst both of these things are true the funny thing was the statement from the German Government offering “Clarification”. The statement said “it is not about criticizing our British friends,” really? Because that really is what it sounded like to me. The statement went on to say, “the Finance Minister simply made very clear…….. why a limited drop in VAT is not an appropriate instrument for Germany or for the fight against the Global recession.” Uh huh. Whilst it wasn’t about criticizing you, your idea is rubbish. It must be nice to be in politics, you can say one thing and then some one in your department will issue a statement for you spelling out what you meant to say in a special form of civil service double talk, nice.
A quick mention for assisted suicide, told one of the stories was depressing, as it came up twice this week. The first time was when the Crown Prosecution Service decided not time press charges against parents who help their 27 year old son take his life in Switzerland earlier in the year. This leaves us in an interesting legal grey area because helping someone to end their life in illegal in this country, helping them include enabling them to travel to another country where it is legal i.e. Switzerland, but, as far as I’m aware, the CPS has never pressed charges against anyone who has done this and as our legislators flatly refuse to even discuss the subject we are left with this situation were whilst it is illegal you won’t get prosecuted so it is sort of legal. Not the best way to leave this very complicated and emotive issue I think you will agree. Personally I am in favour of assisted suicide, if it was necessary I would like that option please. I would like to choose the manner and timing of my death if I was that ill. Obviously the problems would come in the legal framing of this so that people couldn’t be cajoled into doing it or people who felt that they had become a burden on their family etc but still I would like that option. You would put an animal out of its suffering, so why would you not help some one you love. Suffering is not just physical pain, it is the knowledge that at some point in your life the time is going to come all you can do is blink, you are feed by a tube, a machine breaths for you and all you can do is see this happening. The counter arguments are strong and persuasive but when they involve quality of life arguments the person best placed to make decisions on that is the person suffering.
The other mention of it was because Sky showed a documentary about it midweek. A couple’s journey was shown as they decided what they were going to do and then the final act as the man took his own life. There was shock and outrage in our papers, “how can they show a man die?” was the line taken by most of them. It’s a terrible thing, a new low, etc etc, oh and here are some pictures of it! I’m sorry? What now? Television is bad for showing it but it’s ok for you? No, fine, just so that we know where the line is. Many groups, mostly religious, were appalled that this program would be shown because it would “glorify” assisted suicide. Two points here, I am assuming that most of them hadn’t seen the film because very few people had; I don’t think they were at a press screening so they weren’t really making a well informed point and “Glorifying” assisted suicide? Glorifying death is very difficult with several thousand years of religious fundamentalism behind you. Simply showing some people making the most important decision that anyone can every make and then carrying out that decision isn’t glorifying anything, it shows how hard the choice is. It shows that these choices are not hurried, rash or flippantly made. No one was forced or persuaded. 2 rational people made a well informed decision. No more, no less. Many people just upset about a film on television showing death it’s self. I’m sorry; do you not watch the news? It is wall to wall death and suffering. Was it because it was a real, actual death and not a television entertainment death? It was not a Hollywood film or and HBO series, it was not news-atainment, it was real. It was a real person dying and that is hard to watch I can assure you.
A quick mention for the BBC’s Sport Personality of the Year, an amusing concept for me as most sportsman don’t seem to have a personality, but well done Chris Hoy, he was my choice, and well done Ben Geyser from Dorchester who won the Unsung Hero award for his work with local boxers.
And so to the awards,
The Award for Wuss of the Week,
This goes to the “comedian” Alan Carr who felt it necessary to apologise for a joke he made BACKSTAGE, not during the show, at National Comedy Awards. He said that he originally planned his Celebrity Ding Dong sketch to feature Rough Women not Fashionistas.
"It didn't work out because they couldn't cast it. I suppose it is a bit difficult to find rough women. I suppose Shannon Matthew's mum was busy," he said.
"Oh yeah, she would be my dream guest. I think she's a gay icon. People like a bit of rough don't they?"
Carr added: "I must be obsessed with her actually if you look at my Google searches. So I should dedicate this award to her."
My problem is not the joke, although it isn’t that funny, it’s the speed at which he apologised. It took him less than 24 hours because a couple of papers got a bit pissy, good, it’s his job, but clearly he doesn’t believe in the things that he said otherwise he would have stood by his remark.
The Award for Shaping My Formative Years,
This goes to Oliver Postgate, co-creator of Bagpuss, the Clangers and Ivor the Engine to name but a few who died this week. As a mini tribute here are a few little clips from some of his programs,
Bye for now.
Sunday, 16 November 2008
Diana Watch
Good news! They’ve re-sited that bus stop. Bad news! Nasty Wetherspoons want to stop doing their pub quiz because they are not making a massive profit on it. Now that just isn’t nice and after all the effort we went to last Monday to dress up for it as well. Significant other looked very nice in her bestest party frock and I wore a lovely grey wool 3 piece, over dressing for fun, we drank champagne as well, they definitely made a profit on that week.
Can you guess why significant other came home from the Chinese supermarket with this packet of dried lemon grass?
Enough smut and on to the weeks news which has been dominated by the death of a baby. The odd thing about this is the way that the story of baby “P” has dominated the media but the death of a baby and toddler stabbed to death by their mother has not. In both cases various bodies were involved and yet the babies still died. So what is the difference? I think it is the fact that social services were involved in the baby “P” case and the media loves to slate them. Many years ago there was a scandal in the papers that too many children where being taken into care. Much fuss was made and the protocols by which decisions are made were changed and now there is a fuss that too many children remain at home, who’d be a social worker?
This sort of convenient amnesia by both politicians and various media outlets has also been evident in the treatment of the world’s financial problems. Unemployment has risen to an 11 year high, which is sad for the people who have lost their jobs, and these numbers have been attacked by the Tories but who was in charge 11 years ago? No, wait, I can get this one……… oh yes, it was them! On the Andrew Marr program this morning George “I love big yachts me” Osborne said that the value of the pound is the lowest for 13 years. Again, who was in charge? I think you can guess.
It does seem that the Government is considering some sort of Roosevelt style “New Deal” i.e. massive government spending on infrastructure projects in order to stimulate the economy and give people jobs. Now, while this is a good idea in principle there have to be one or two things taken into consideration. The first, and some would say the most important, is the fact, now widely excepted, that the New Deal didn’t really work and it was the beginning of the 2nd World War that really stimulated the U.S. economy. Do we want a massive war to get us all spending again? The second point is how this spending will be directed. The problem is that during these chastened times those against the “Green” agenda will use it to claim that everything good is far too expensive. They will want quick fixes, build runways and power stations. Let the next generation worry about the planet way have to save our profits from extinction. Well how about we try and kill 2 metaphoric birds with 2 politically expedient stones. How about massive government investment in environmentally sound industries and technologies? Invest in research into making micro generation, my personnel favourite as I’m sure you will have noticed, or even carbon capture. No one has ever built a full scale power plant with carbon capture and storage technology, so why don’t we? Think of the kudos! Think of the jobs! Invest in mass insulation projects. Invest in research into wave powered generation or hydrogen fuel cells for cars or into cleaner fuel sources for shipping. Oh, quick note on shipping. Due to the current turmoil in money the amount of shipping currently ruining this nice green planet is down 90%, every cloud, silver lining etc.
Now, whilst reading yesterdays Guardian I noted that Polly Toynbee had mentioned in passing a similar idea and I said to significant other, “ha, I wrote about on the blog last week, she’s a week behind me”, it turns out that she wasn’t and I wrote it in my note book on Monday or Tuesday and had thought I’d written it last week, D’oh.
One of chemistry’s most enduring problems has been solved this week by Dr John Emsley of the The Royal Society of Chemistry who has come up with the definitive recipe for Yorkshire Puddings and here it is,
Ingredients
Tablespoon and a half of plain flour
1 egg
Skimmed Milk to make a thin batter
Half a teaspoon of salt.
Method
Put flour in a bowl, make a well in the middle, add the egg, stir until the two are combined then start gradually adding the milk and water combining as you go.
Add the liquid until the batter is a smooth and thin consistency.
Stir in half teaspoon of salt and leave to stand for 10 minutes
Put beef dripping into Yorkshire pudding tins or into one large tin but don't use too much fat.
Put into hot oven until the fat starts to smoke.
Give the batter a final stir and pour into the tin or tins.
Place in hot oven until well risen - should take 10 to 15 minutes.
Sorry it hasn’t come too you before lunch time today (and there are no quantities, blame the internet, because I can’t find it with any) but you’ll just have to wait until next week too try it. The most surprising thing about this is that finally some one has found a use for skimmed milk. I am pretty sure that this is the first time in all recorded history that this has happened.
The E.U. (European Union) has decided to scrap some of its food and vegetable standardisation laws, although not the ones that affect the really expensive ones strangely, and this has been welcomed by many newspapers which have used them, incorrectly, as a metaphor for interfering E.U. ministers. To be honest the story isn’t that interesting but it should lead to slightly cheaper food prices, apparently up to 30% of fruit and veg has had to been thrown away but it does give me the opportunity to tell you my favourite E.U. regulations gone made story. The Sun once reported that the regulations called for English sausages to no longer be called sausages unless they contained some more meat. Of course the paper overreacted to the story with ridiculous headlines and rhetoric bordered on the xenophobic. Their view seemed to be “leave us alone to eat our crap food that contains no nutrition whatsoever and may actually do us harm.” Sun readers are odd people.
This comes from a long line of “Interference” stories that our papers like to run. The other favourite is the “Winterval” type of story. The problem with all of these types of story is that they are made up. They are not true. They are, at best, misinterpretations, be that accidental or deliberate or, at worst, lies, but for a good “Winterval” story, the first of the year I believe, go to http://5cc.blogspot.com/2008/11/theyve-banned-christmas-its-pc-gorn-mad.html
Whilst we are sort of talking about Christmas, as it should always be called, not Xmas, whilst shopping in the surprisingly busy considering the credit crunch Bournemouth on Saturday we went into Monsoon and they are officially the first shop to be playing seasonal tunes. Feel sorry for the people who work there, over 6 weeks of Wham and East 17. Every year that passes without a shopping assistant running amuck with a tinselly hanger and a giant bubble, slaughtering all insight is a surprise to me.
And so to the Awards,
The Award For Disappointment Of The Week (Not Including Pub Quiz Cancellation),
Significant Other came home this week and said that there was a man in South Street (Our shopping street) standing on a small plastic stool berating the non-believers and damning us all for our belief in the “fairytale for adults” that is evolution. I pulled on my “Godless Liberal” T-shirt but wasted time trying to decided between that one and my “Atheist” T-shirt and by the time I arrived at the spot outside Waterstones he was packing up to go home, such a shame.
The Award For Surprise Of The Week,
One of the many unbelievable plots in the dreadful soap opera that is Hollyoaks is that of the young people of the village forming a band. Well guess what? They are too realising a single. Oh yes, a big proper single with a video and everything. This, in it’s self is not a great surprise, it is a road well travelled, but the surprising thing is that it isn’t bad. Yes, it is a cover, originally by a band called The Dimestars who once supported Kylie I believe (I looked it up, I didn’t know that) and the riff sounds a bit like “Too drunk too fuck” by The Dead Kennedys but that’s no bad thing. Oh and the middle 8 is a bit dodgy but I’m being picky, it’s ok really and to prove it you'll have to go to this url because i'm not allowed to embed it, http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=uvQ1-10pnTo
The Award For The Most Middle Class Thing I’ve Seen All Week,
Who needs a mango stoner, really, who’s life would be completed by one of those?
Have a good week and happy birthday for my Brother for tomorrow xx
Can you guess why significant other came home from the Chinese supermarket with this packet of dried lemon grass?
Enough smut and on to the weeks news which has been dominated by the death of a baby. The odd thing about this is the way that the story of baby “P” has dominated the media but the death of a baby and toddler stabbed to death by their mother has not. In both cases various bodies were involved and yet the babies still died. So what is the difference? I think it is the fact that social services were involved in the baby “P” case and the media loves to slate them. Many years ago there was a scandal in the papers that too many children where being taken into care. Much fuss was made and the protocols by which decisions are made were changed and now there is a fuss that too many children remain at home, who’d be a social worker?
This sort of convenient amnesia by both politicians and various media outlets has also been evident in the treatment of the world’s financial problems. Unemployment has risen to an 11 year high, which is sad for the people who have lost their jobs, and these numbers have been attacked by the Tories but who was in charge 11 years ago? No, wait, I can get this one……… oh yes, it was them! On the Andrew Marr program this morning George “I love big yachts me” Osborne said that the value of the pound is the lowest for 13 years. Again, who was in charge? I think you can guess.
It does seem that the Government is considering some sort of Roosevelt style “New Deal” i.e. massive government spending on infrastructure projects in order to stimulate the economy and give people jobs. Now, while this is a good idea in principle there have to be one or two things taken into consideration. The first, and some would say the most important, is the fact, now widely excepted, that the New Deal didn’t really work and it was the beginning of the 2nd World War that really stimulated the U.S. economy. Do we want a massive war to get us all spending again? The second point is how this spending will be directed. The problem is that during these chastened times those against the “Green” agenda will use it to claim that everything good is far too expensive. They will want quick fixes, build runways and power stations. Let the next generation worry about the planet way have to save our profits from extinction. Well how about we try and kill 2 metaphoric birds with 2 politically expedient stones. How about massive government investment in environmentally sound industries and technologies? Invest in research into making micro generation, my personnel favourite as I’m sure you will have noticed, or even carbon capture. No one has ever built a full scale power plant with carbon capture and storage technology, so why don’t we? Think of the kudos! Think of the jobs! Invest in mass insulation projects. Invest in research into wave powered generation or hydrogen fuel cells for cars or into cleaner fuel sources for shipping. Oh, quick note on shipping. Due to the current turmoil in money the amount of shipping currently ruining this nice green planet is down 90%, every cloud, silver lining etc.
Now, whilst reading yesterdays Guardian I noted that Polly Toynbee had mentioned in passing a similar idea and I said to significant other, “ha, I wrote about on the blog last week, she’s a week behind me”, it turns out that she wasn’t and I wrote it in my note book on Monday or Tuesday and had thought I’d written it last week, D’oh.
One of chemistry’s most enduring problems has been solved this week by Dr John Emsley of the The Royal Society of Chemistry who has come up with the definitive recipe for Yorkshire Puddings and here it is,
Ingredients
Tablespoon and a half of plain flour
1 egg
Skimmed Milk to make a thin batter
Half a teaspoon of salt.
Method
Put flour in a bowl, make a well in the middle, add the egg, stir until the two are combined then start gradually adding the milk and water combining as you go.
Add the liquid until the batter is a smooth and thin consistency.
Stir in half teaspoon of salt and leave to stand for 10 minutes
Put beef dripping into Yorkshire pudding tins or into one large tin but don't use too much fat.
Put into hot oven until the fat starts to smoke.
Give the batter a final stir and pour into the tin or tins.
Place in hot oven until well risen - should take 10 to 15 minutes.
Sorry it hasn’t come too you before lunch time today (and there are no quantities, blame the internet, because I can’t find it with any) but you’ll just have to wait until next week too try it. The most surprising thing about this is that finally some one has found a use for skimmed milk. I am pretty sure that this is the first time in all recorded history that this has happened.
The E.U. (European Union) has decided to scrap some of its food and vegetable standardisation laws, although not the ones that affect the really expensive ones strangely, and this has been welcomed by many newspapers which have used them, incorrectly, as a metaphor for interfering E.U. ministers. To be honest the story isn’t that interesting but it should lead to slightly cheaper food prices, apparently up to 30% of fruit and veg has had to been thrown away but it does give me the opportunity to tell you my favourite E.U. regulations gone made story. The Sun once reported that the regulations called for English sausages to no longer be called sausages unless they contained some more meat. Of course the paper overreacted to the story with ridiculous headlines and rhetoric bordered on the xenophobic. Their view seemed to be “leave us alone to eat our crap food that contains no nutrition whatsoever and may actually do us harm.” Sun readers are odd people.
This comes from a long line of “Interference” stories that our papers like to run. The other favourite is the “Winterval” type of story. The problem with all of these types of story is that they are made up. They are not true. They are, at best, misinterpretations, be that accidental or deliberate or, at worst, lies, but for a good “Winterval” story, the first of the year I believe, go to http://5cc.blogspot.com/2008/11/theyve-banned-christmas-its-pc-gorn-mad.html
Whilst we are sort of talking about Christmas, as it should always be called, not Xmas, whilst shopping in the surprisingly busy considering the credit crunch Bournemouth on Saturday we went into Monsoon and they are officially the first shop to be playing seasonal tunes. Feel sorry for the people who work there, over 6 weeks of Wham and East 17. Every year that passes without a shopping assistant running amuck with a tinselly hanger and a giant bubble, slaughtering all insight is a surprise to me.
And so to the Awards,
The Award For Disappointment Of The Week (Not Including Pub Quiz Cancellation),
Significant Other came home this week and said that there was a man in South Street (Our shopping street) standing on a small plastic stool berating the non-believers and damning us all for our belief in the “fairytale for adults” that is evolution. I pulled on my “Godless Liberal” T-shirt but wasted time trying to decided between that one and my “Atheist” T-shirt and by the time I arrived at the spot outside Waterstones he was packing up to go home, such a shame.
The Award For Surprise Of The Week,
One of the many unbelievable plots in the dreadful soap opera that is Hollyoaks is that of the young people of the village forming a band. Well guess what? They are too realising a single. Oh yes, a big proper single with a video and everything. This, in it’s self is not a great surprise, it is a road well travelled, but the surprising thing is that it isn’t bad. Yes, it is a cover, originally by a band called The Dimestars who once supported Kylie I believe (I looked it up, I didn’t know that) and the riff sounds a bit like “Too drunk too fuck” by The Dead Kennedys but that’s no bad thing. Oh and the middle 8 is a bit dodgy but I’m being picky, it’s ok really and to prove it you'll have to go to this url because i'm not allowed to embed it, http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=uvQ1-10pnTo
The Award For The Most Middle Class Thing I’ve Seen All Week,
Who needs a mango stoner, really, who’s life would be completed by one of those?
Have a good week and happy birthday for my Brother for tomorrow xx
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